Thursday, May 21, 2009

new stuff starting

Some new pieces beginning... I seem to be drawn to working in pairs; every piece I've started or conceived so far has a twin. I'm sure I could think of something deep for this to represent about my current state of being, but I'll save that for later.

These are "You" and "I". Something that came to me while sitting in the sun in Jumpin' Java, regarding the nature of where my head is at recently... open-hearted and excited but with a touch of the lonely-melancholy. Eyes closed and turned inward but also mirroring and connecting to the outside--world and individuals. A duality, in the sense of a double meaning, and also in the sense of the way I connect with others, in a very one-on-one, personalized way... that would make it a triple meaning, wouldn't it? Hell, let's go for broke and see how many layers of meaning I can get! The wings and stars come up for me a lot in my own library of symbols; they run the gamut of dazed, confused, open, full of wonderment, etc...here they're serving me to talk about being is a state of dazed curiosity; open-mindedness with a touch of spacey disconnect.

This is why I avoid artist statements and why I trip on talking about my work. It, like my own thoughts, has lots of meanings going on. It's hard for me to narrow it down to being about one, concise, easily-stated thing. Maybe by the finalization of these I can spit out a nice sound-bite about them, but for now it's "they're about this but also that and oh a touch of this over here... " But honestly, that's what it feels like in my head... clarity through a whole lot of sound and fury, plenty of strength but very little certainty.

it continues...

"You" sketch and first layout



"I" sketch and first layouts


Tuesday, May 19, 2009

oh gloriousity...

...when will i learn that i need to take my camera EVERYWHERE? Everytime i leave without i see more snippets of lovely that needed documenting, and i know my head cannot hold them all without assistance. I just went on a post-dinner run/hop/skip up the hill to the park and back, wearing too-big jeans, buffeted by typical San Francisco gusting and full of springy-air glee. i amused a German tourist with my fancy-dance over the vista of the city, but then he decided i was safe to ask for directions. The sun was cutting over Buena Vista Park, flame outlining the black tree-horizon and splashing the sides of the buildings in gold. Devil-tower stood, proud and majestic, taking on a classic air with gilt edges. The city sprawls before me and i could just eat it all up.

no, i didn't take this. done stole it. was so purty. credit to jim stanley.

artist dilemma

how to convey what moves me the most? The moments of such clarity and intensity, walking through the city at midnight, fog drifting its tendrils over everything, street-lights hovering, casting tom-waits shadows on the pavement. Jasmine blooming and glowing bay windows hinting at their jewel-toned secrets. The wet tang of the air that wakes me up and makes me know that I'm in a coastal town, throwing me into nostalgic memory-drift and making me soul-hungry. How to translate that into art? How to take these transcendental cookies of time and share them, bring someone else in to feel that same moment, or inspire them to remember one of their own. Michael Shankman can do it, at least, he can for me, but I feel ill-equipped to follow his lead. City-scapes impress and intimidate me, and maybe that right there is a reason to pursue them, but I'll admit the prospect overwhelms me--I don't know where to begin--plus I feel like I've already met the master. Big sighs. It is both exhilarating and frustrating... to feel so moved and fascinated by this city; by all its private moments of beauty, but to also feel so incapable of using and translating that energy into something tangible. It's like an itch in the mind...

at least I can SEE the transcendental brilliance at all...next, what to DO about it.

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

A few quick city shots, a few quick fire shots...

city being all picturesque and shit.

INVISIBLE BIKE!
We have the best street art here.

Me being pensive (read: terrified) before the Fire Expo in Union Square.


Gorgeous Bevin the Fire-Safety Captain. She puts out.

Michael and his personal insulation system.

Fire Drums! OMG!

Jess and Bevin reveling in the glow.


Firedrums was INCREDIBLE. 3 days of adventures in the redwoods, flames, amazing people, wonderful food, mind-blowing spinning. And rain. Lots and lots of rain. I'm so lucky to live in this city, in this environment, where this shit comes from and thrives, where studying circus arts and running around like a glitter-covered beastie is totally normal.


Jess's Survival Kit, end product.

The party was a blast and the box pleases me...

The picture doesn't do the sparkly effect justice; it's covered in varnished glitter.

The interior. Also glittery, I might add, and full of wonderful nonsense. The bride will be rendered incapable of taking anything too seriously.

Sunday, May 10, 2009

Done.

Oh yes, and 5thousand is officially done, signed, varnished, put to bed. Thanks to Jason for the loan of his jawline, his persona and his lovely, tempestuous self.

beautiful untrue things



My GOD my world is covered in dog hair! It's like she's undergoing a slow explosion.

I'm exhausted. I tried to fit too much progress into one day. I'm really trying to dig into my work as a conversation with myself; a way to think and talk about things visually... talking to myself, yes, but also to the world at large, or at least I hope so. I find talking about my work to be very difficult, which is, as someone trying to work towards making a living as an artist, is pretty fucking detrimental.
"So, what do you paint?"
"ummmm.....people? Birds and stuff?"
It's an incredibly hard question for me! My work is figurative, but I wouldn't label it as portraiture. I don't have a soundbite for it. What is this current, juxtapoz-mag young art style called? Lowbrow doesn't cover it properly anymore. I like to use figures, but they are elements, characters, instruments to convey a feeling or situation. I also am continuing to build my own library of personal symbols; the elements that show up again and again in my stuff. Scarves, wings, stars, hands, etc. Some of these have assigned or static meanings, others just have a sense of weight and significance but no direct translation. Some of it I just aesthetically like, but that's not a very deep reason, so don't tell.

These four are precursors to what I'm working on now. I did these in a frenzy, at the beginning of this latest personal upheaval and artistic push/refocusing. They mark a shift from me trying to be somewhat commercialy viable to saying "fuck it" and coming back around to some personal fundamentals. This is me remembering that I like to draw. This is also me pouring alot of frustration and gut-wrenches out.


Here Again.


Almost


Not Listening


Can't Deny Nature